Surprise Saturday: The Half-Life of Desire
Even the shiniest goals fade fast — and perhaps we should let them
315 km/h — the fastest I've ever gone in a car. That's 195.7 miles per hour, more than twice the highest speed limit you can find anywhere in the United States.
Was it thrilling? You bet. Nerve-wracking? Absolutely. Would I do it again? Maybe.
But if I die without ever driving this fast again, I won't lose any sleep over it.
That's a big statement coming from someone who basically learned to speak by playing a game called "Name that car." I grew up with toy cars, posters, magazines, racing games — and I still want a Ferrari. But setting my speed record taught me this:
The half-life of desire is short.
In chemistry, radioactive elements have a so-called half-life. It's the time it takes for a batch of, say, uranium, to lose half its radiation power. The things we desire in life lose their radiation power really, really fast.
Of course, the quickest way is to attain them. You drive a cool car every week, and you’ll get used to it in a month. You see your spouse every day, and eventually, you’ll take them for granted. Sometimes, achieving our goals is the only way to show us we never needed them in the first place.
But even if you're not there yet, what once seemed all-powerful and shiny can quickly lose its allure. That's why delaying rewards is often a smart move. Shrink them in size, and you might end up happier when you finally do treat yourself than you would have been if your big prize inevitably failed to live up to your expectations.
To celebrate my college graduation, I thought about renting a car. I hadn’t driven a fast one in a while, so why not take a weekend and hit some cool roads? But the longer I planned it, the less I wanted it to be a big deal. In the end, I didn’t need the craziest of cars for a week. I picked a smaller one for a day, and I had a blast nonetheless.
We have a saying in Germany: Nothing's eaten as hot as it's cooked.
It means that, usually, the event you fear won't be so bad. But it also applies to the events you're excited about. Have fun by all means, but manage your expectations — and remember you don’t have to drive at 200 miles an hour to enjoy the ride.
-Nik
About Surprise Saturday: In the long run, the only good pattern is breaking our patterns. That’s why, every once in a while, we need a shock to the system. An unexpected idea. A creative surprise. That’s what we’ll unwrap every Saturday.
Picasso said he didn’t seek. He just found. Let’s keep exploring.