I think the core message of embarking on a creative journey each day should be included in the Empty Your Cup book--
my only criticism is the fourth paragraph was pretty (in a literary sense), but I needed to read it (4) times to understand it, and I think most readers will not have the patience to do that.
'A true explorer sails every day, not for the expectation of finding treasure each minute, but for the faith that if she keeps exploring, treasure will sometime[s] appear – [something] she could not have found at the bottom of even the deepest wine jug.'
suggested changes :
- 'sometime appear' → 'sometimes appear',
- remove : 'if only by some divine deviation' → replace with : 'something'
(of course I don't want to tell the writer how to write, the point being only to make it easier to read)
I think the core message of embarking on a creative journey each day should be included in the Empty Your Cup book--
my only criticism is the fourth paragraph was pretty (in a literary sense), but I needed to read it (4) times to understand it, and I think most readers will not have the patience to do that.
'A true explorer sails every day, not for the expectation of finding treasure each minute, but for the faith that if she keeps exploring, treasure will sometime[s] appear – [something] she could not have found at the bottom of even the deepest wine jug.'
suggested changes :
- 'sometime appear' → 'sometimes appear',
- remove : 'if only by some divine deviation' → replace with : 'something'
(of course I don't want to tell the writer how to write, the point being only to make it easier to read)
Thank you! Wonderful feedback! It's definitely a mouthful. Maybe I can break it up a bit to make it easier to digest. Appreciate the notes!